Hold Your Breath  — You Can Breathe

I am now a radiation patient.  Radiation is the third step of the treatment my doctors have said will kill my cancer and prevent it from returning.

I have radiation five days a week on the right side of my body, basically under the arm and around my breast.  I have gotten used to the indignity of the hospital gown, the baring of my breast area and being manipulated by technicians so that I am in the exact correct position for the radiation “beam” to hit me.  Don’t get me wrong, the people at the radiation center are great.  They are patient, respectful, and very caring.  However, it is still not a comfortable procedure.

During the course of my radiation treatments I have to hold my breath several times.  This helps them get the radiation to where it needs to go.  Once the Techs are done positioning me, they leave the room and the room is sealed up.  Then it is just me and the huge machine.  Through a microphone, the technician will tell me when I need to hold my breath.  The “beam” starts its work and when it finishes, I hear the Tech say, “You can breathe.”

This whole process reminds me of how my life has been throughout this year.  I have been holding my breath (figurative speaking) since I was diagnosed with cancer at the beginning of 2022.  Holding my breath with each blood test.  Holding my breath with each imaging test.  Holding my breath with each consult with various doctors.  I have been waiting to reach the end of my cancer treatments.  Holding my breath for the time when I can get back to normal.  Waiting for the fears to subside.  Waiting for someone to say to me, “You are cancer free” so I can now go ahead and live my life.  Waiting for someone to say

You Can Breathe

Change, Grow, Evolve

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